


a warm sort of death

by Evedawalrus



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Anxiety, Feelings Realization, Gift Exchange, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Minimus deserves good things, Rodimus is so annoyed, Social Anxiety, haha me projecting on my favorite characters??? noo, of a sort, yeah it's like 2 days after valentines day but it basically counts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-16
Updated: 2021-02-16
Packaged: 2021-03-18 22:14:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29497113
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Evedawalrus/pseuds/Evedawalrus
Summary: Megatron just wants to help. Minimus just wants to be selfish for once. They stumble around each other and somehow manage to realize some very important things.
Relationships: Megatron/Minimus Ambus (Transformers), Megatron/Ultra Magnus (Transformers)
Comments: 8
Kudos: 32





	a warm sort of death

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LordKnightAlex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LordKnightAlex/gifts).



> This fic was written for LordKnightAlex for the Minimegs server gift exchange!!! I'm honestly very happy with how it came out, so I hope you enjoy!!!

The realization began with a datapad.

Their hands brushed when they tried to pick it up at the same time from where it sat on the table, Rodimus having slid it forward between them. It was a report detailing fuel consumption – something they had to discuss before they made their next planetside stop, so the proper amount of energon could be purchased along with other supplies. That this point was brought up during their meeting was very important to Minimus, who had to make sure the numbers all add up and would become inconsolable if he was unsure. 

But anyways. The tips of their fingers touched as they reached for the datapad, and both of them froze for just a moment longer than necessary. Then, they both retracted like they had touched hot irons and the pain had only now set in, red-faced and stuttering out apologies. 

“Ah- sorry-”   
  
“My bad, I should-”   
  
“-didn’t mean to, you go ahead-”   
  
“-no, you reached for it first-”   
  
“-really, it’s fine, you can-”

Rodimus’s stare flicked between the two. His nose scrunched up, and after a long minute of such back-and-forth, he sighed loudly and slapped his palms down on the table. 

“ _ Okay _ , if you guys aren’t gonna stop anytime soon and won’t let me leave so you can continue, I’m gonna do something shocking and out of character and move this meeting along, cool?” He yanked back the datapad and held it out to Minimus, who blinked at it like Rodimus was handing him the captainship.

“Ah- er- yes, right, back to business. I suppose.” Minimus coughed into his fist and started reading over the fuel consumption details, taking on his usual firmness of character, and Rodimus allowed himself a small sigh of relief before letting his optics glaze over. 

Megatron, meanwhile, was far more preoccupied with other things. He held the hand that had brushed Minimus’s by the wrist, thumb just below the heel of his palm, almost like he was checking for a pulse thrumming through the wires. The tips of his fingers were warm. They were- downright  _ hot _ , heavy and leaden. If he looked away from them he would perhaps think they were glowing, right where Minimus had… touched him. 

Megatron was averse from other bots touching him, to say the least. Really, could you blame him? He had spent the last four million years of his life being attacked on a near-constant basis, so his systems had taken such reminders to mean “any and all approach is absolutely probably a threat.” If a bot was getting too close to him they were aiming to plunge a dagger into his vitals – he had learned that many times over from Starscream alone. And if a bot was trying to  _ hug _ him… he cringed at the memory of the Magnus armor lumbering towards him, arms outstretched. He had been such an idiot to think that it had been Minimus, who would not so much as cough without permission, much less hug someone without their consent. 

...But now that it was in his head, he wondered exactly what it  _ would _ be like for Minimus to hug him. Thinking about it, he  _ had _ had contact with the smaller bot before (they worked like a well-oiled machine, putting together those cloaking devices – he had barely to ask Minimus to lift him up), but it was just part of their working relationship, nothing so formal as…

“Megatron? Have you been listening?”   
  
Megatron snapped back into himself to see Minimus cocking his head at him in such a way that reminded him of a curious turbofox. Then, Minimus’s words hit him and his cheeks went red with embarrassment. 

“I- er.” His shoulders sunk. “I wasn’t, Minimus. I apologize.”

Minimus frowned, and Megatron felt his spark twinge. “Well… As long as you don’t do it again, I accept your apology.” 

Megatron sighed in relief, giving Minimus a grateful smile. Minimus blinked at him and then turned away – but not before he caught the smallest glimpse of a smile in return. 

“Oh, so he just gets a pass for daydreaming during meetings but I don’t?” Rodimus scowled, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms with a huff. “Ugh, talk about double standards.”

Minimus and Megatron gave each other a very obvious, commiserating look. Rodimus grimaced. “You guys are gross.”

After getting through the inventory (Minimus had managed to fit in an overview of medical supplies, much to Rodimus’s consternation), Megatron stood up to go. Rodimus had sped out of the room before Minimus had finished saying, “that should be all for today,” leaving him alone with Minimus, who would probably stay behind as usual, going over his notes one more time-

As he turned his head to say goodbye, Megatron’s train of thought stuttered to a halt. Minimus was gathering up his things. 

“Minimus,” he spoke before thinking, stopping awkwardly when he realized he hadn’t yet figured out what he was going to say after that. When Minimus looked up at him, Megatron noticed a dull sheen to his optics – a sign, he remembered from the medical textbook he kept stowed under his berth, of fatigue. “Have you been getting regular rest?” He cringed internally at his flat tone. If he wanted to be a medic someday, one would think he’d need a better bedside manner than  _ Ratchet _ . 

Still, Minimus seemed not to take it too personally. Instead he blinked in surprise, then glanced down at his datapads, shuffling them in his hands. “Er. Mostly, I suppose. My last recharge cycle was… a bit difficult, but you don’t need to worry yourself – if the problem persists, I’ll make an appointment with Velocity.”

Perhaps a few months ago such an explanation would have sufficed for Megatron. Now, he only felt concern curl in his chest, an uneasy little thing he did  _ not _ like. “That’s good, but-... are  _ you _ okay? ...Did anything happen?”

Minimus’s optics went wide. For a moment he looked like a cornered cougaraider, hackles raised – and then he caught himself and forced his shoulders down, taking a deep breath. “Well, I did have… yesterday, I was at Swerve’s – off-duty – and- I’ve been trying to socialize more, you see. And, well, I’ve tried watching others, to learn how exactly to- to do it, and yesterday I felt bold enough to approach a small group who were talking and laughing together at one of the tables.” Minimus hugged the datapads to his chest, looking down at his feet. “I asked if I could join them. I don’t believe they had malicious intent – they seemed-... confused, more than anything, but they- they said that they didn’t really have any more room.” He swallowed, his face heating at the memory. “I apologized and walked away. It felt like- like everyone was looking at me, like everyone noticed and I- I couldn’t breathe, it was just so stupid and small but it felt like so  _ much _ , and I could still hear the sound of them talking and their laughter- it  _ hurt _ -”

He hiccupped, and turned from Megatron. “I- I’m sorry, give me a- a second-” 

Megatron stood there, frozen to the spot, until Minimus’s ragged breaths began to even out again, and he stood up straight once more. “I’m… anyways, since then I’ve found it difficult to relax, even in order to recharge properly.”

“That sounds… unfortunate.” Megatron said, feeling hopelessly out of his depth. “...Have you- have you talked to Rung about it?”

Minimus’s face twisted up, and Megatron’s spark sunk. “I’ve- that’s just it, I’ve been meaning to, but- there’s just isn’t enough  _ time! _ I have so much to do and if I- if I stop working, my processor goes back to- I just can’t do it!” 

Megatron, to say the least, did not know what to do. Minimus, primus forbid, seemed either about to burst into tears or collapse of exhaustion, and both of those would be infinitely worse than what was happening now, so he had to do  _ something _ . What did one do to help someone feel better? Talking was a good option, but at the moment all of Megatron’s legendary charisma had decided to desert him. 

Megatron quietly hoped this wouldn’t backfire horribly. 

“I’m sorry for unloading so much of this on you- you’re probably terribly busy and I’ve just been taking up your ti-” Minimus felt his words halt in his throat as warm pressure surrounded him. He meant to freeze up – he truly did, because what else did one do at an unexpected hug? But his frame, deprived of a good recharge, shaky, frazzled, and tired down to his struts, decided against the action and instead melted right into Megatron’s embrace. 

He almost fell asleep right there. However, he suddenly remembered that when receiving a hug, one was supposed to hug  _ back _ – and so he did.

The two of them existed like that for a little while, frames trying to remain tense but sparks jittering at a kind of contact neither of them had had for centuries. Megatron, who had prepared himself to be shoved back – maybe shot at for good measure – found himself… enjoying it. 

Wasn’t that something. 

When Minimus spoke again, his voice held just the slightest tremor. “I thought you didn’t like hugs?”

Megatron almost let go at the comment, but Minimus’s arms had not moved from his sides. “I think I prefer to initiate. You don’t get shot in the back a couple hundred times without learning some things.”

Minimus almost objected to the exaggeration – and then remembered who Megatron was, and quietly shut his mouth. A moment after, he had the thought that- Megatron had initiated.  _ Megatron _ chose to hug him – Megatron, who avoided such casual contact so common among the crew, who flinched at taps on his shoulder, who… who… 

A lump grew in his throat. 

Burying his face into Megatron’s shoulder, Minimus murmured, “You give very nice hugs.”

Megatron pretended not to hear. Minimus knew he did anyway. 

When they eventually pulled apart, Minimus’s optics glowed just a bit brighter. “I was planning to go over some reports in my room after my shift is over. Would you perhaps like to join me? I think- if we were to work together it will be much more efficient.”

Megatron swallowed, and cleared his throat. “I think… that would be doable, yes. I would like that.”

Minimus smiled.

* * *

When Megatron knocked on Minimus’s door that evening, he was surprised to receive no response. 

He stepped back, bringing a finger to his comm. and calling Rodimus.

_::if this is about the holiday party i swear i’ll remember it i even put a sticky note on my laser pen so i wouldn’t forget okay::_  
  
_::...This isn’t about the holiday party, though I do commend the dedication.::_  
  
_::oh ok what’s up then::_  
  
_::I was wondering if you have seen Minimus around.::_

_::Uh no he’s off-shift, and even tho that usually doesn’t mean anything cause he just keeps working he left when it was time. He actually said he had like a date with you in his room or whatever, which btw gross::_

_::...He said that?::_

_::ugh ugh ugh_ ofc _that’s what u get from that!! but no he didn’t call it a date cause he’s a dork like that::_

_::I see. Don’t go spreading rumors about him, Rodimus. I will know if you do.::_

_::hey that’s swerve’s job not mine. anyways go do ur nerd date, no way in hell he’d stand u up when he was almost smiling abt it earlier::_

Megatron turned off his comm. with a huff, then turned back to Minimus’s door, which stood stubbornly silent. Rodimus could be obnoxious about it, but he was right about one thing: Minimus wouldn’t have gone off somewhere else when he had a meeting scheduled with Megatron – and he would  _ not _ have forgotten. 

For a moment he warred with himself over what to do – and then, using his authority to override the lock, he quietly opened the door and stepped inside.

“Minim- ah.”

Just inside, Minimus sat asleep at his desk, head pillowed on his arms and his cheek half-pressed against a datapad. Beside him sat a few reports, an odd little figure that resembled Ten, and-... two cubes of energon. 

“Oh,” Megatron breathed. 

He glanced back at the door, and then quietly stepped closer, peering over Minimus’s shoulder. The minibot’s optics were grey, and his face was-... well, he was still frowning. But it was a gentler sort of frown – one that wasn’t carved from stone, but formed naturally. It felt soft, somehow. 

Megatron suddenly had the thought that this was inappropriate, sort of. Though it wasn’t really breaking any rules but it- it felt like it was breaking a rule, like the rule of “don’t stare at your cru- your fr- your second-in-command while he’s sleeping, or whatever,” and he was losing track of his thoughts. He shook his head to disperse them and sighed. 

Minimus was obviously in need of some good rest, and he did  _ not _ want to stand in his way. At the same time, the angle at which his neck was bent presently was making him cringe. 

Megatron took a deep breath and put a hand on Minimus’s shoulder, shaking him the slightest bit. “Minimus? I’m sorry to bother you.”

Minimus blinked after a few seconds, optics glowing a dim red as he woke. “Hrm? What- Megatron? But you were-...” He slowly looked at the datapad he had been slumped against. “...Oh. Our meeting. I- I fell asleep. I’m s-” he yawned, “-sorry.”

He truly was exhausted, Megatron thought as Minimus struggled to raise his head and look him in the eyes properly. Sympathy welled up in his spark. “It’s perfectly fine, Minimus. You need rest. …Can you get to berth on your own?”

Minimus gained enough energy to look surprised. “You’re not- I-... I’m not sure I can.”

“...Would you mind if I carried you there?”

Minimus hesitated. Then, he yawned again, so widely his optics dimmed. His head dipped before he snapped it back up again. “No, I-... I wouldn’t. Mind, that is. Thank you.”

“Alright. ...I’m going to lift you now.” Gingerly, Megatron looped one arm under Minimus’s back and another under his knees. Minimus out of his armor was quite easy to hold, fitting almost perfectly in his hands. As soon as he lifted him, Minimus – though he seemed to be trying to stay awake – went limp against his frame. 

“...’m sorry, I shouldn’t… ‘s not polite.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Megatron said and silently hoped Minimus could not feel how hot his spark was flaring. 

Even if he had, he did not seem to mind, melting into his chest with a contented sigh. Yet even as his optics darkened, he seemed flustered. If Megatron wasn’t so occupied with pushing down his own blush he might have noticed Minimus’s sleepiness warring with his desire to not embarrass himself, but he was, so he didn’t. 

Luckily, Minimus’s berth was approximately three Megatron-steps away, so they reached it relatively quickly and Minimus was set down. Megatron stood up, and, upon realizing he didn’t really have anything else to do, turned to leave. “I’ll let you get your rest now-”

“Wait-!”

Megatron stopped, swiveling on his heel with a note of concern. Minimus heated under the weight of his attention and sputtered, “I- you- could you maybe… I should sleep but… maybe you could read a, a report? I doubt I could read one myself at the moment,” he rubbed an optic, “but perhaps I could listen?” 

His voice was wavering – he knew that and still hoped Megatron wouldn’t hear it, but by the sigh Megatron let out it was clearly a fruitless endeavor. And yet- Megatron pulled a chair up next to the bed and sat down. 

“If I’m being honest – and I hope you don’t mind that – I don’t think you would absorb anything meaningful from any of these reports.” Megatron rested his forearms on his knees. “...But if you would like me to stay, I could… just. Talk?” 

If Minimus were another bot he might have exploded to see Megatron, gladiator of Kaon, scourge of Cybertron, destroyer of worlds, acting so damn  _ awkward _ . However, most of Minimus’s interpersonal relationships were conducted with an air of awkwardness, so he didn’t see much wrong with it. “That’d be nice,” he muttered as he got comfortable on the berth, head tilted to gaze up at Megatron. 

And so they talked. 

Minimus did not absorb much of it, quickly falling into an only somewhat lucid state, humming and nodding occasionally to be polite. His processor was on the verge of finally shutting down when Megatron’s voice penetrated the thick fog around his thoughts. 

“I have to wonder… I know you are very tied to your convictions – it’s an admirable trait, for a lawman – and I cannot thank you enough for your defense at my trial. I know you must have hated it at the time. But-... what would you be, if you were able to throw those rules away? If you didn’t have to be held to them, to hold yourself to them? What then?” Megatron was looking at the wall, expression distant but thoughtful, like he wasn’t truly asking Minimus. 

Minimus answered anyways. “M’not sure.”

Megatron’s optics focused, turning to Minimus with a note of surprise. 

“It’s… always been about other things. About Dominus. My studies. My work. Never had the time to-... to be indulgent. ‘S a waste of time. And I was fine with that.” He yawned, long and wide enough for Megatron to glimpse the smallest pair of fangs between his lips. His voice grew smaller, and without realizing his frame curled up a bit. 

Megatron leaned forward to catch his words, resting a hand on the edge of the berth. 

“I just… don’t think about it much. ….’m not sure what I would be without them. It’s.. my rules are  _ me _ . Have to follow them so I know what’s right ‘n what’s wrong. But then I mess up. I almost got my captain killed, because- because what’s right and wrong is-....  _ moldable _ . So now I have to come up with new rules. With.. a new me. And I think-... I think I want…..” 

Fuzzily, Minimus’s optics caught on Megatron’s hand and flared faintly. Slowly, he reached out and put his hand over Megatron’s. It felt so terribly small in comparison, but it felt… right. Or not right, but  _ good _ .

“...I know you’re a bad person,” he murmured, and Megatron felt his breath catch in his throat. “I know you don’t deserve to be forgiven, or… whatever else. But- but you’re my friend. You… For once- just, just for once- I’d like to be selfish and have you be all mine. S’all I want.”

When Megatron said nothing in return, Minimus sighed – and dropped off into a blissfully silent sleep. 

Megatron sat there for a few minutes, listening to Minimus’s soft breathing. Breaking his stare from Minimus’s slack expression felt like it took physical effort – and his optics could only shift to where Minimus’s hand lay atop his. He turned his hand over and gently gripped it, and faintly tried to push away the realization wrapping around his neck like an embrace. And yes, he probably already knew it. 

But knowing something and feeling its warmth in your palm is very different. 

“Oh no,” Megatron whispered, and fell in love with Minimus Ambus. 


End file.
